Cameron is seven going on eight now. He’s our miracle baby. On miracle that is Cameron is his infectious enthusiasm. Today, I may need some of that.
* Did you know that enthusiasm’s etymology is, “from Greek enthousiasmos “divine inspiration,” from enthousiazein “be inspired or possessed by a god, be rapt, be in ecstasy.” That’s Cam! But Quentin needs his video games. I’m going to miss the daily contact with these boys so badly.
I’m up early, and figured I’d blog a bit rather than write in my notebook. The moon was shining full into my west facing bedroom window, so I enjoyed the moon shine til I decided I could take a nap this afternoon if I wasn’t going to sleep well this morning.
TO DO List
1. Make or buy a brisket or ham to take over to Mike & Artie’s. Beth died Monday night, funeral is tomorrow. I am getting too old, and must have too many friends. They’re dying off. Oddly, today, I’m chipper and ready to face the day.
2. Get the first of the nine scrub caps completed. The rest of them will go factory style… like my aunties sew. Serendipity! I was walking with Carolyn Monday, and interrupted her line of thought with, “I need to go buy a serger.” “Do you want to use mine?” She has an old Baby Lock (HEAVY…built for eternity) that LB passed on to her when LB bought a new one. So now I have a loaner and if I like it I may yet buy another. I threw the last one out because I never used it.
3. Walk with Carolyn. Thank God for walking buddies. Makes it so much harder to say, “Oh well, I’ll walk another time.” Carolyn gets up and walks when she hasn’t slept well, when all her joints are whining, and she stays cheerful.
I guess last is to try to remember Beth’s cheerful ways, and know that she is in the hands of Our Savior. When someone I care for very much dies, I always wonder what’s on the other side. Faith assures us that it’s more than falling into the earthly pit.
Tomberg, a Christian esotericist is quite sure that similar to the Hindu belief, there is reincarnation. Contrary to Hindu belief, we don’t reincarnate in non human form. That might be some sort of a mechanism to work out our destiny if we don’t get it right. And frankly, how many people do you know that have “gotten it right?” I know a few who seem absolutely true to “who God intends them to be.” But most of us muddle along. So maybe we do get another shot. If my nephew hadn’t been born before my Father died, I’d swear he was the reincarnation of Daddy. And if Miranda isn’t Mother returned, she is VERY much like her. Mother and Tania always had a special bond, so it’d be appropriate. More likely, we’re born among strangers in a different time and place, and have to refigure it all out.
The most convincing evidence I’ve seen for such a view is the incredible way my newborn Tara looked around when after she was born, they lowered the lights in the delivery room. She was very alert, and calm, taking in the surroundings, seeming to say, “ok, now what?” There’s a special wisdom in a newborn. It is as if they have to do a lot of forgetting as they are relearning to use their body, a new weak one.
Oddly, as I age, I fear death much much less. I fear dependency much more. Growing in faith makes some very real changes in our heads, and mostly our hearts.
Now, let’s go make a wonderful day!